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Sometimes life seems like a Petri dish—all these reactions from so many of our ingredients brewing at the same time in the same space, reacting differently under various degrees of pressure, while toxic elements out of our control keep blowing in.

But instead of taking all this stuff personally, I’ve been trying to see myself as a chemist—
to take a look at all these ingredients, figure out what new ingredients I could add to create a less volatile environment, how to lower the pressure, and how to make sure I’ve got a decent filter in place to keep so many contaminants from getting in the mix.

-JLK

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My mommy told me NOT to climb the Titan Tree. If you have never heard of the Titan Tree, I’m going to tell you what it is. It’s the biggest tree in the known universe. It stretches from Planet Earth all the way up to Titan. And it has a red caution ribbon around it with signs all over that say DO NOT ENTER! DANGER! But I really needed to climb the Titan Tree. Sometimes I’m in control of my brain and other times, I am not. This was one of those times I was not.

            So I started to climb the tree. I passed squirrels and bird nests and then my head went through a cloud and almost knocked into a star. Then, I was too high for my own good and I started to cry. I could see the earth. I could see the blue and the green but I could not see my house or my mommy and this made me the most sad and the most scared I’d ever been.

            Thank goodness my phone had a signal. So I called my mother and she was more than stern when I told her where I was. I have never heard my mother so upset. In fact she was so angry that her legs started to shake and grow bark. Right there on the sidewalk they turned into tree trunks that grew bigger and bigger while she was roaring into the phone about how angry she was. And in a matter of minutes, she and I were face to face at the tippy top of the Titan Tree.

            Her face was made of birch and her arms were the longest branches and her mouth was so scary I hid behind her leaves. And then she grabbed me. I didn’t know what she was going to do. Thank goodness she hugged me. Hugged me so close to her chest I could barely breath. I was crying, “I’m sorry, Mommy, I shouldn’t have climbed the Titan Tree.” And she was crying too. “I love you so much, but when are you going to start listening to me? When?” “Right now,” I said. “Like the last right now?” “No,” I said, “Like this new right now.” And I hugged her back as tight as I could and we started shrinking down down down through outer space till we were back on the sidewalk again, like regular people.

            And then my mommy took a deep breath. “How about we get some ice cream?” she said. And I said, “That sounds nice, Mommy.” And so we did. And we had a nice rest of the day.

The End.

-JLK

(This story is part of my collection of short stories for small children, Feed It to the Worms.)

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When my son was four, he kept telling me he had an imaginary friend named Mahabba Mahabba Mahabba Mahabba Mahabba Mahabba, and when I looked it up, I found out it means love. This story is from my book, Feed It to the Worms, a collection of very short stories for small children.

The Biggest Beach Towel

I know a boy named Mahabba Mahabba Mahabba Mahabba Mahabba Mahabba. And one day, he and his mama went to the beach and sat next to another mama and her boy.

And Mahabba Mahabba Mahabba Mahabba Mahabba Mahabba noticed that the boy’s towel had some letters on it. And so he asked the boy, “Excuse me, but what does your towel say?” And the boy said, “It spells my name. Max.”

And Mahabba Mahabba Mahabba Mahabba Mahabba Mahabba couldn’t believe it. “Wow,” he said. “I didn’t know towels could say your name on them!”

So he asked his mama, “Mama, can I have a towel that says my name on it?” And because his Mama always gave him everything he wanted, she said, “Why of course you can!”

And so later that day, his mama called the personalized towel factory and ordered her son a towel. “Wow, that’s a mouthful,” the man told her. “Give us a couple months.”

And a couple months later, a giant box was waiting for him on his stoop. Mahabba Mahabba Mahabba Mahabba Mahabba Mahabba was so excited.

He and his mama took the towel right to the beach. And as soon as he got there, he ran over to Max and waited for his Mama, who was lagging a bit behind because she needed a hand truck to carry the thing.

And after they unfurled this gigantic towel, every child at the beach ran over because they’d never seen such a giant towel.

In fact, it was so big that every boy and girl at the entire beach could play on it. And so they did. And everyone had the best day they ever had.

The End.

-JLK

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I don't consider myself moody.
I simply experience all four seasons every month.
Knowing this, there's no need to force myself to grow and blossom on those days that feel cold and harsh. I can allow myself to stay dormant and conserve every drop of my life force, knowing that mild weather will return.

-JLK